Editors Note: When we envisioned this resource guide, our goal was to make celebrating Jewish traditions accessible and welcoming to everyone, regardless of their level of observance. We wanted to create a space where the beauty, meaning, and joy of Judaism could be easily embraced by all. One of our inspirations for this effort has been JewBelong, a remarkable organization with a mission that resonates deeply with us. 

JewBelong captures their purpose best in their own words: “Let’s face it, Judaism can be a little/lot intimidating. Sometimes all of the rules and regulations keep people away, and then they miss out on the good stuff. JewBelong is out to change that by helping you find the joy, meaning and relevance that Judaism has to offer.” Their creative, inclusive approach to Jewish engagement, combined with their impactful efforts to combat antisemitism (including their signature pink billboards), makes them a powerful force for good in our world. We are grateful to JewBelong for allowing us to draw from their resources on Shabbat, and we are proud to share this collaboration with you. 

“THE RESET” AKA “SHABBAT” 

According to tradition, Shabbat is not simply a good idea, but a Mitzvah. The Ten Commandments say: “Remember Shabbat and set it apart. Six days you shall toil and do all your work, but the seventh day is the day of rest.” In 11th century France, the medieval sage, Rashi, focused on a curious part of the commandment: “Six days shall you toil and do all your work. How, he asked, can you complete all your work in six days?” 

Rashi understood what we still face today: That there is simply more work to get done each week than we can possibly manage. Said Rashi, “When Shabbat comes, it should seem to you as if all your work is completed, even though it isn’t. You should stop thinking about work.” Friday evening is designed to help us perform this magic trick, to begin to act as if our work is done. 

The concept of a day of rest was also alien to many ancient people. The Greeks and Romans ridiculed this peculiar tradition, accusing ancient Jews of laziness for resting one day out of every seven. But while Shabbat is called a day of rest, it would be a mistake to think of it as a lazy day because real rest is restorative. It recharges us spiritually, as well as physically. Our transition from work to rest can begin as early as Thursday, which was market day. Preparation of the Shabbat meal began, and we wished each other “Shabbat Shalom.” Shabbat can free us to spend time with those we love and to savor small moments that usually pass unnoticed, freeing us to reflect on what matters most. The candles, readings, songs, and wine are all here to help set the mood, creating an atmosphere of warmth. 

HOW TO SHABBAT 

First off, THERE ARE NO SHABBAT POLICE Some people like to bake a challah or set the table with the good china (is that still a thing?) but that’s not for everyone. Do NOT, we repeat, do not get overwhelmed by the idea that your Shabbat has to be fancy. The traditional Shabbat celebration starts with four blessings before dinner: candles, wine, challah and one for the people that we love. Just grab these items: 

Challah (for the challah blessing). No challah? Use whatever bread you have in the house. No bread? Use a pretzel! 

Wine and kiddush cup (for the blessing over the wine). Or, use grape juice or a juice box. Hell, use a margarita. (If you haven’t figured this out yet, we are desperately trying to emphasize that you can’t do it wrong. The only way to do it wrong is to not do it.) 

Candles (for the candle blessing). 

Dinner: You can go old-school and roast a chicken, but maybe you feel like Pad Thai instead? Fabulous! Busy week? Kick Shabbat off with a martini. 

Yes, Friday is fabulous because it is the end of the work week, but Shabbat makes it more than that. And, if one week your Shabbat isn’t as inspirational or warm as you like, just wait seven days and try again! The important thing is to set Friday nights apart and make them special. Try one of JewBelong’s skits! Or go to a synagogue. Friday night services often include singing, are on the shorter side, and you might really enjoy it. (Pro tip: Saturday morning services tend to be longer.) You can do this!